excuse me? would you mind repeating that?

On a recent Wednesday evening I was in an orchestra rehearsal when the fire alarm went off. It turned out that the building was not burning down, but of course we had to evacuate anyway. When we got back inside and returned to rehearsal, we found that a handful of people had gathered all their things and used the fire alarm as an excuse to take off early. Referring to one of the bassoonists who had disappeared in such manner, the conductor asked, "What happened? Did he die in the fire?" But it sounded a little bit different to me. I turned, utterly befuddled, to my neighbor and asked, "What did he say? Because I heard 'upgrade to papaya' and I'm sure that can't be right." It wasn't.

Today I was discussing something nonsensical, I'm sure, with Vanessa, and I began a sentence with, "At that rate..." But she heard, "O thyroid...!"

Vanessa's gchat status at one point today read, "in the pit of thesis schmesis", but Claire looked at it quickly and thought that it said "in a pit of feces". Gross.

My status was listed, "is using powerpoint?" but, glanced at by a visitor, changed to "is using powergoat".

Claire's status read, "holy flying kittens!" No, really. I read that one right.