Tuesday, February 10, 2009

10: don't drink the kool-aid

I took a shower this morning.

Wait, wait, that's not the news.

So I step into the bathtub and turn the hot-water knob counter-clockwise, wait a few seconds for the water to warm up, give the cold-water knob a twist and test for an ideal temperature, adjusting the mix accordingly. And, well, after the water had been running for twenty or thirty seconds, it started coming out black. You read that right. Black. Water. Flowing into my home. (Not that Blackwater, though.) Surprise! Good morning!

Reflexively, I shut off the tap and stared disbelievingly at the black droplets that had splashed onto the tile wall. I cautiously turned the water back on, and almost immediately it began running clear again. I wondered briefly if perhaps I hadn't hallucinated the whole thing. I mean, black water running from your tub faucet? Come now, fantastical stories have their place, but they also have their time, and it's early morning and I prefer clean, colorless water for my shower, if you don't mind.

A freak occurrence. Except that it happened again while I was rinsing the conditioner from my hair. And once more while washing my hands in the sink.

The question on your mind at this point, as it is on mine, will no doubt be What the hell?? (or some variant thereof).

My answer is (a) I don't know, but (b) I have some theories, and (c) I am open to other theories/explanations that you might offer, both serious and facetious (bonus points if you pull off both at once).

My property manager is sending a plumber over tomorrow to check it out. In the meantime, well, I guess I won't be so surprised by a moment or two of discoloration in tomorrow morning's shower. Unless, of course, tomorrow it's a color other than black. Now wouldn't that be exciting? I'm hoping for magenta.

(photo credit: Stunt of the Litter)

4 comments:

chrome3d said...

Take a photo of the black water and put it here. Then people here can tell you if you are hallucinating. Now you have to go there armed with a camera every time:)

Claire said...

yes arm yourself with a camera in the shower. actually, please don't--probably wouldn't be good for the camera.

I think a chartreuse would be a nice color.

emily said...

Well, I had a camera ready, like you suggested (don't worry, I kept it waiting safely outside the shower stream), but alas, nothing to report today.

You now doubt me with more certainty.

Chartreuse? Like having Mountain Dew on tap!

Ben said...

Happened to me the other day. I think it was a brush with the Lacanian Real. Once manifest it was immediately symbolized again, this explains why the water ran clear so quickly. The fact that it happened multiple time means that there is a rupture in your psyche and that you should go to Buenos Aires and see a psychoanalyst. (OK, I just thought I'd come up with an excuse for you to go to Buenos Aires)